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managing your mind

Anatomy of an Apology

Anatomy of an Apology

There is a quiet epidemic I’ve noticed in my life coaching clients and saw in my patients, particularly my patients with GI issues. An epidemic of shame and guilt that keeps folks feeling small and from living into our truest power. That epidemic is summed up in two words, “I’m sorry.” I want to talk…

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Accepting Our Racist Biases

For many White and White-passing folx starting the working of becoming anti-racist, we become so scared 😨 to do or say the wrong thing that we don’t do the work because we get stuck in that activated fear body.⁠ ⁠ And that’s where the work needs to start, to learn to be okay with being…

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Co-regulation

Co-regulation is a vital human function.⁣⁠⁣ ⁣ Co-regulation happens when our autonomic nervous systems attune to another person, and there is an energetic exchange that helps both creatures to get into ventral vagal, to feel safe, secure and grounded in the moment.⁣⁠⁣ ⁣⁠⁣ I say creatures because while most of us think of this as…

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Bypassing a Challenging Feelings Makes it SO Much Harder to Change

If you’re White or White-passing and you’re starting to do the work of becoming anti-racist, you may feel a sense of urgency to change your thoughts 💭.⁠ ⁠ This is an attempt to create different feelings without really sitting with the painful 😖 truth.⁠ ⁠ It’s called emotional bypassing ⏭️.⁠ ⁠ And that simply doesn’t…

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Emotional Childhood

Emotional Childhood

As children, we have limited capacity to control our emotions, and even less ability to take ownership over our behavior. Because we’re kiddos – and developmentally, we just aren’t there yet. As physical adults, we can easily slip back into an emotionally childlike state where our inner child is calling the shots, keeping us from…

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Inner Child

Inner Child

In childhood, we learned to survive, to please our parents, our teachers, to label our behavior internally as either all good or all bad and to make it mean something about us as beings. We learned to think in black and white ways because that’s what children do, and to judge ourselves where we fell…

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You’re a Human Being Not a Human Doing

Slow down the busy

  Self-love and self-care are such common buzzwords right now. If your social media feed is anything like mine, it’s full up on posts about self-care and the best ways to do it. And it often seems to involve lying on some perfect Grecian island with cucumbers on your eyes wrapped in seaweed as your…

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Coping Mechanisms and Obsessive Thoughts

Coping Mechanisms and Obsessive Thoughts

Functional medicine is so much more than choking down a fistful of supplements every day or doing a dozen lab tests. I believe deeply in root cause medicine. And the longer I do this work, the more clarity I have that self-love is the key to healing. It is only from a place of true…

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Negative Self-Talk

Negative Self-Talk

We’ve all done it. we’ve all heard ourselves say, “Oh, I’m the kind of person who doesn’t eat vegetables, who doesn’t work out, who doesn’t finish what I started, whose always late, who doesn’t drink water, who always procrastinates, who gets angry at the drop of a hat, who’s always anxious, who is a workaholic,…

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