Posts Tagged ‘perfectionism’
When You Stop People-Pleasing, People Aren’t Pleased! And that’s okay
When people are accustomed to you putting their needs and wants and whims ahead of yours, they likely won’t be delighted when you start to heal, grow and learn to put yourself first. the people-you-used-to-pleased may have some feels about that… and that’s okay. truly. i didn’t say it would be…
Read MoreRoot Causes of Why We People Please
When we are focusing on pleasing other people, the irony is in that moment, we’re usually not actually pleasing ourselves. We’re putting other people’s wants, desires, joy, happiness, as we imagine it, ahead of our own. This people pleasing habit often comes from our childhood, from a deep mammalian need and desire to feel safe…
Read MoreCompare and Despair: How to Release Judgement
Do you ever hear about a friend’s achievements and your heart sinks? You’re totally happy for them, but something within you starts wondering why you didn’t get that job, that engagement proposal, why you didn’t reach that goal or milestone in the same timeframe that they did. This is called compare and despair. Your brain starts…
Read MoreLetting Go of Resentment: It’s Not Personal
Resentment is a powerful siren song. For a moment when you feel hurt, it feels so good to blame someone else for how you feel, to tear them down, defending yourself. “She’s a monster,” you mutter under your breath. “She’s the worst.” But the thing about sirens is that they only lead your ship to…
Read MorePerfectionism: Keeping Your Enemy Close
Perfectionism is a mindset, a thought habit, often informed by your childhood and societal lessons. A belief that you are anything other than completely perfect and worthy of love exactly as you are. This thought habit can keep you chasing your proverbial tail, always trying to prove your worth to the world and to yourself.…
Read MorePerfectionism: Why B+ Work is Key to Healing
Perfectionism is a sneaky little thought habit indeed. It keeps us running in a perpetual hamster wheel of self-doubt, self-loathing, and never enoughness. So what is perfectionism? And how do we know if perfectionist thinking is what’s driving us? How can we distinguish goal- setting, ambition, desire, passion for our work, from perfectionism? Perfectionist thought…
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