Podcast

One key component of codependent thinking is the misguided belief that it’s our job to rescue others. The trope of the rescuer has us operating and giving, even when we’re running on empty, and while this seems like a worthwhile and honorable endeavor, the truth is there’s a fine line between attempting to rescue those…

In the first part of our relationship mini-series last week, you learned that I can’t actually tell you whether to stay or go when the going gets tough in relationships. However, what I can do is take a deep dive into the science behind relationships and guide you through some questions that will spark self-reflection…

As we learn to see and overcome our codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing thought habits, we may start to question all of our relationships. Some of us may be tempted to swing from deeply enmeshed and codependent to wildly unattached and independent, or even better, to land somewhere in the middle, in interdependence.  Say you’re coming…

You’ve heard me say it a million times over here on the podcast: you can’t heal hurt with hurt. I often hear my clients talk about their choices and their past with so much regret. They live their lives shouldering the heaviness of shame, blame, and guilt towards themselves, and my love, you already know…

This week’s topic is one that hits close to home for both me and my clients inside Anchored. Our parents or caretakers are who we looked to in childhood for wisdom and guidance, but we forget that they too are fallible humans just like us. And for some of our parents, raising kids was more…

If you’re a frequent listener here, you’ll know how much I love a good metaphor, and this episode is no exception. I came up with a saying some years ago that applies to relationships, and it’s this: I want you to be the cake and let everyone else in your life be the delicious icing…

I have an important question to ask you my loves: if your body was not a problem to be solved, what would you wear? This beautiful question was posed by my guest today and it is just a morsel of the amazingness she has to share about style and confidence. Judith Gaton is my friend…

Last week, we kicked off a vital conversation about a cycle of self-abandonment that those of us with codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing thought habits unwittingly put ourselves through. We over-function, overcompensate, and overdo for people who haven’t asked us to, essentially living their lives for them, and this very often leads to feelings of irritation,…

As a chronic codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing thinker, one of the methods I used in childhood and far into adulthood to try to get the love, care, and acceptance I was looking for was to over-give. I used to give from my empty cup instead of from my overflow, more than I wanted to, and…

Welcome to the final installment of our mini-series all about interpersonal conflict. We’ve been speaking at length about what conflict is and how to support ourselves, and last week, I hinted that I would share something I love so much and have found to be truly helpful in any relationship: Clean Fight Club Rules.  If…